Chapter 482 - God's Punishment
(MC POV)
Now I'm sitting in the waiting room with Queen… I mean Empress Guiying sitting on her knees in front of me, her majestic aura as an Empress from before completely gone.
I folded my arms in front of me, "So… What was all that?"
"What was what?" Guiying asked, tilting her head cutely.
"You know what I mean. Did you make me the head of your religion without me knowing or something?"
"Teehee~ Maybe?"
I gave the Empress a forehead flick.
"Owwww!! Master bully!"
"No you. I never asked for this role did I?"
"Mouuu! Master said you didn't want to be king! But there's no way our followers would accept Master being in a low position! So we made you the head of our religion! Master didn't say no, after all~"
I chopped her on the head, "At least tell me beforehand."
"Ahhhh! Master! That hurts!"
I turned to the side to see the rest of my disciples also sitting in the same position as Guiying, except they had to hold an extra bucket of water above their heads as well.
Diao Chan was one exception, since I knew this would just be a reward for her instead. So for her, she could only stand at the side and watch, which made her quite restless as a result.
Oh, Cai Hong's sitting beside me of course, munching quietly on a cookie I gave her. She probably knows that we're having a serious discussion now since the little dragon made sure not to disturb me.
Even then, she's still cute so I had to head pat her a few times.
"How long have you all known this and kept it from me?" I asked.
Lian Li shivered from her punishment, "A… About a week…"
I continued staring at her.
"A… A month…"
"That's another hour for all of you. Better not spill any drops or I'll be adding more time."
All of them groaned but made no complaints, at least they understood why they're being punished.
I turned back to Guiying who was still holding her head in pain, "Any chance of me stepping down?"
"Umm… Without causing a revolt? Probably not… Whoever heard of a god stepping down from their own religion?" Guiying admitted, though she muttered the last part a little inaudibly so I didn't really hear what she said.
I sighed. Why did things become so complicated all of a sudden?
"I never even knew there even was a religion here. Who do you even pray to?"
Guiying looked at me then glanced to the side, "Umm… God?"
Ah, so it's a monotheistic religion. I wonder what's the story behind it.
"Well, I'm not religious so I'm pretty sure I'm the worst person to be taking this position. Don't you think so?"
Guiying shook her head quickly, "Not at all! That's what makes Master perfect for the position! There's no one else more suitable than Master!"
I really want to ask why but something tells me she wouldn't give me a straight answer either.
So instead, I just flicked her head again.
"Owwieee!!" The Empress of Beiyang cried.
"So, is this your way of telling me that I'm giving all of you too much freedom? To the point that all of you think you can scheme against your Master?"
Everyone in the room immediately shook their heads, my disciples still being careful with not spilling the water in the buckets.
"N… No! Not at all, Master!"
"We would never!"
"Never, Master!"
"We never intended to, Master!"
"Master! Please believe us!"
"Nom nom… Cookie… Nom…"
I leaned my head on my hand, "Is it because all of you thought if I was asked to take this position I would refuse?"
Guiying poked her fingers together, "Well… That is… Ummm…"
I smiled at her, "In that case, you'd all be right, so I guess I can't fault all of you for that."
"Eh?" Came the collective response from them.
Leaning back on my chair, I sighed, "All of you were doing this for the country right? I take it the previous religious leader died in the war or something and now there's a need to replace him. You needed a Practitioner to occupy that role and having someone you trust take that role would be more preferable."
All of them looked at each other with complicated expressions, proving me right.
I sighed, "It's another political move of yours, isn't it, Guiying? Controlling the religion would also help you with controlling the masses. Did I get that right?"
She continued poking her fingers, "I… I guess that isn't wrong either..."
I shrugged, "Well, what do you need me to do as the head of the religion? Don't tell me I need to hold masses and such because there's no way I'm doing that."
Guiying shook her head, "Oh! Not at all Master! We wouldn't trouble you with such things! As long as… Well… As long as Master accepts your position as the head of our religion, that is already enough!"
I raised an eyebrow, "So… No need to hold sermons and other such things?"
"Not unless Master wants to… It would really honour the believers if Master were to choose to do so!"
"No way. I'll just take the position in name only without all the trouble that comes with it, thank you very much. What is the name of this religion anyway?"
For some reason, Guiying averted her eyes from me, looking rather uncomfortable.
"It's just called The Church, Master," Lian Li answered me cheerily.
Huh… Interesting… Was Guiying embarrassed about the name? Well, whatever, it's not like the name really matters as long as the followers don't mind it.
"Well, as I said, don't make me do anything other than act as a figurehead and everything's fine. Elaria can take care of the new territory and I'll continue being a Master of Heaven Sect."
Guiying rose up to hug my waist, "Thank you, Master!"
I chopped her on the head again, "That doesn't mean I'm not punishing you for setting me up like this. Go grab a bucket and sit beside Lian Li. You're going to sit as long as they are."
"Weeeh?! Master! This is bully!"
"Maybe you shouldn't scheme against your Master, now go before I start spanking you."
Diao Chan raised her hand, a trail of drool escaping from the side of her lips, "Could I ask for the spanks instead Master?"
I ignored her and handed the Empress a bucket of water, the girl pouting at me as she joined my disciples in their punishment.
I guess I'll just wait for an hour before forgiving them, they are really too cute for me to continue punishing them after all. Besides, they were doing this for the greater good, right?
Still, I wonder what things will change now that I'm supposedly the head of a religion? I never actually been one before.
I guess as long as there aren't any fanatics, I should be fine. I wouldn't know what to do if there were actually fanatics in this religion.
Nah, what are the odds of that?
Hmm… Maybe I should go see my mother first.
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