The Daily Life of the Immortal King

The general cultivation hospital hadn’t been able to send enough manpower for the pre-military training physical exam, so Lie Mengmeng had been employed online as a part-timer, and had been responsible for taking test samples from the ‘flowers of the rear garden.’ Apart from that, there were still the regular physical exam items such as height and weight measurements as well as blood and urine tests.

Of these bewildering number of items, nothing could surpass the biggest pain in the neck that was in itself just called “the physical exam.”

By standing on a scanner which used ion ray technology, the machine could rapidly detect bone density, bone condition and how much a man’s little brother had grown… this was the part that Little Peanut was most scared of.

During the blood test, Wang Ling was very embarrassed when the female nurse pricked his finger with a needle and the tip actually bent! These needles had all been specially custom-made by the general cultivation hospital and could easily pierce a body at the Foundation Establishment stage.

The female nurse didn’t believe it and pricked his finger twice more; in the end, the tips of the two needles were both bent…

As the nurse was thinking about complaining to her superior about the quality of the needles, Wang Ling stuck his finger in his mouth and bit it.

Female nurse: “…”

Wang Ling had managed to get through the previous sections without mishap and was able to deal with most of them somehow.

The last part of the physical exam was the one that he was truly nervous about.

Before the advancement of science and technology, orthopedic specialists would be the ones to perform physical exams on students in cultivation schools. Furthermore, these old specialists had the unique and exceptional ability to visually assess something; perhaps this was passed down from Old Lady Dong. Without needing to use a ruler at all, they could tell with one look how long a man’s little brother was as well as its growth rate.

But with the rapid development of technology in the last few decades, the process was now clearly much more efficient than in the past. For what had been the most troublesome part of the physical exam previously, examinees now only needed to stand on a machine and be scanned by ion light for the results.

Little Peanut was very nervous and restless, his blank gaze fixed on some mental horizon.

Because of his physique since young, he was much weaker than regular students at the Foundation Establishment stage. Even his little brother was shorter than that of the average boy. This had given him a sense of inferiority from a young age, so at school he would only dare go to the washroom when no one else was there.

In this respect, he was very similar to Wang Ling.

But Wang Ling’s reason for not going to the washroom was that his was too big…

With Super Chen and Dopey Guo these two thick-skinned guys in the lead, everyone stood on the ion machine one by one to complete the assessment. Five meters away, two female nurses were staring at a screen with lackluster expressions as if they were weathering the gales and billows of life…

Very soon, it was Little Peanut’s turn.

He stood on the ion machine and closed his eyes a little fearfully, his face completely red.

An ion ray slowly scanned him from top to bottom…

Right at that moment, Wang Ling, who had been behind Little Peanut in the queue, secretly moved his finger.

Among the Three Thousand Great Spells, there was a “Graft and Transplant Spell” which allowed a person to graft a portion of their body onto someone else’s. In order to make sure he didn’t stand out, Wang Ling felt that he could collaborate with Little Peanut a bit… but once he used this skill and after he undid its effects, he wouldn’t be able to take back one third of the grafted portion…

Before long, the ion ray scanned Little Peanut’s middle torso.

All the boys who were present saw the two female nurses in front of the monitor screen actually cover their mouths; their expressions were awed, as if they had seen some prehistoric beast!

What the hell! — This was just too big!

Why was such a small boy actually so thick and solid down there?!

Little Peanut slowly opened his eyes when he sensed something wasn’t right.

The two female nurses looked as if they wanted to devour him, which made his entire body feel uncomfortable.

Twenty minutes later, everyone was done with their assessments.

The computer also swiftly collated the “physical exam” reports together and gave each person their electronic copy.

When Little Peanut timidly looked at the report after school, he was stunned! — Thirty… thirty-seven centimeters? What the hell… didn’t this already completely exceed the Western standard?! Was his thing a donkey whip? Was his so large?

Unable to quite believe it, Little Peanut pulled his pants open to take a look, and was completely dumbfounded…

Although it wasn’t as exaggerated as thirty-seven centimeters in the physical exam report, it was clear that his little brother fully met the standard for an average guy, and even exceeded it a little.

Why was it like this?

Student Su Xiao stood up from his chair in astonishment — and for the first time felt what it was like to be heavy down below. He was so moved his tears came gushing out! Little Peanut had unexpectedly grown up!! Had his birthday wish actually come true? Thank you, almighty cultivation god!

Wang Ling: “…” You lucked out !

…

…

When Wang Ling got home that night, the kitchen was empty and Mother Wang and the old man weren’t around. All that remained of the large Wang family was father and son and Loopy Toad.

The groping incident was the current buzz, and for the first time, Mother Wang was a storybook heroine. Reporters from the major news outlets were doing whatever they could to turn her into tabloid gossip.

Whether it was Father Wang or Mother Wang, both of them couldn’t stand being pestered like this. In the end, the couple had talked it over and Father Wang had decided to straightaway send Mother Wang and the old man off on a stress-free trip on his salary card to avoid the limelight. They hadn’t even taken any luggage with them when they left, and would just buy clothes and daily necessities on the road.

It was the first time that Wang Ling felt that Father Wang was so generous…

Sure enough, the coolest man was the one who cherished his wife!

But with Mother Wang and the old man’s departure, dinner became a problem.

In theory, Wang Ling didn’t need to eat at all, since he could maintain his bodily functions by absorbing spirit energy from nature every day. But after so many years, dinner had already become a habit for him… if he didn’t eat dinner, he would feel a sense of emptiness.

It was impossible to order take-out, as the Wang family’s small villa was too remote and completely outside the take-out range of service. The only solution now was for this father and son pair, along with Loopy Toad, to go out themselves in search of food.

Father Wang had already searched for businesses closest to East Huang Road. Within an area of eight hundred kilometers, there was only one restaurant called “Midnight Dining Hall”…

Father Wang frowned as he quickly noted that this restaurant’s rating was pretty low; on the Douban food review website, it actually only scored 2.6… and this was a damn ten-point system!

When they opened the restaurant’s available menu, both father and son were alarmed…

A small bowl of lao tan ¹ pickled cabbage beef noodles…

A medium bowl of lao tan pickled cabbage beef noodles…

A large bowl of lao tan pickled cabbage beef noodles…

And then…

There was nothing else…