Chapter 330 Eating Is Like Fighting a War!
Chapter 330 Eating Is Like Fighting a War!
When Li Yundong brought out another plate of dishes, he was shocked to find that there were no braised pork balls in brown sauce left. Only a dish filled with a dreary-looking soup was left lying alone on the table.
Li Yundong asked with astonishment, "Have we been robbed? What's going on?"
As soon as Su Chan saw Li Yundong, she turned around and pouted. Her expression was one of grief and tears were rolling from her eyes.
Seeing her like this, Li Yundong thought that she had been bullied. He was shocked and asked, "What's happened?"
Su Chan sobbed, "Yundong, I didn't get to taste a single one of them!"
Hearing this, Li Yundong burst out laughing. Affected by his sudden joviality, everyone else in the room also laughed.
Su Chan only grew more and more aggrieved. She punched Li Yundong with her little fists, stomped her feet and said childishly, "You are so annoying. Stop laughing at me!"
Li Yundong hurriedly turned back to cover the dish and said with a smile, "Hey, be careful. You'll have nothing to eat at all if you knock it over."
Only then did Su Chan notice that there was a braised eel on the plate. She immediately began drooling and said eagerly, "I shall take the first bite this time."
Li Yundong looked up and saw that all of the disciples of the Fox Zen School were looking at him with longing in their eyes. They focused on the dish in his hand so eagerly, it was like they hadn't eaten anything for years. He thought in his heart, "Oh my god, this is a group of hungry demons who have not eaten for thousands of years! I bet this dish will be finished in a flash!"
Li Yundong hurried back to the kitchen with the plate. Seeing him turn and leave, Su Chan shouted, "Hey, where are you going? I'm going to have my first bite!"
Li Yundong laughed and shouted back, "This fish can't take your one bite all by itself! I'll bring it back when all the other dishes are ready. Otherwise, I will bring it and you will eat it, and we'll be left with nothing again!"
After that, he slammed the kitchen door.
Su Chan was depressed. She rushed to the door, then pounded on it and shouted, "Yundong, I'm starving to death. Let me eat something first!"
The door suddenly opened after she had been knocking for a while. Before she even had time to close her mouth, Li Yundong stuffed something past her lips and then slammed the door again.
Su Chan's mouth was totally full. She thought it was something delicious that Li Yundong had given her, but when she bit down on it, she found it was extremely hard and her teeth almost shattered.
Su Chan spat out whatever was in her mouth. It turned out to be a walnut, the shell of which had not been removed!
Su Chan stomped her feet and said, "Well, well, well! You intend to satisfy me with a hard walnut? No way! Give me something to eat!"
At this time, Li Yundong opened the door again and asked seriously, "One is not enough? How about two?" Then, he handed over another walnut.
Su Chan cried secretly in her heart, grabbed the walnuts, and then walked to the living room angrily to sit on the sofa alone and wallow in self pity.
Li Yundong closed the door with a bright laugh. Inside the living room, all the disciples from Fox Zen School were covering their mouths and chuckling too. Seeing Su Chan peeling the walnuts angrily, Cao Yi tried hard to hold back her laughter and walked over to Su Chan. She handed her a braised pork ball in brown sauce and said, "Chan'er, this is my last one. You can have it."
Su Chan turned her head and saw that the braised pork ball in brown sauce had already been bitten into. How could she finish it? She felt increasingly depressed in her heart and said, "No, and I don't want to eat later!"
The disciples of Fox Zen School all laughed out loud. Some little foxes whispered, high on the schadenfreude, "Great! It’ll be nice to have one less person to grab the food so we can eat more!"
Su Chan heard their words and suddenly regretted it. She thought to herself, "I'm really a fool. why did I bet on myself? I will only end up hungry if I don't eat anything."
However, she had just said those words in anger. She was too ashamed and couldn't take back her words easily. She shifted her moist eyes, wondering about what excuse she could find to eat.
After about half an hour, the kitchen door suddenly opened. Li Yundong, Zi Yuan, and Ruan Hongling all came out carrying two dishes in their hands each. They went in and out a few more times and eventually brought more than a dozen dishes to fill the table.
Looking at the banquet before her, Ruan Hongling was complacent. She shook her head and said, "Fortunately, I am clever and witty. I already expected this situation and hence bought so many ingredients in advance. Otherwise, humph！You guys would be eating nothing but the northwest wind."
Zi Yuan laughed and said, "Would it kill you to not show off for once?"
Li Yundong waved his hands and said, "My fellows!"
The younger disciples of the Fox Zen School grinned and replied, "Yes!"
Li Yundong hadn't expected them to be so interesting. He immediately chortled and said, "Get ready to eat!"
The little foxes had been waiting to hear these words for a long time. All of a sudden, their eyes brightened and they waved their arms and rolled up their sleeves, ready to enjoy the meal.
Li Yundong was shocked by their behavior and quickly shouted "wait!" upon seeing that they were raring to go.
His shout could stop the master of any sect from moving, let alone these little foxes.
Hearing Li Yundong's shout, the little foxes all stopped and looked at him in confusion. It seemed that they didn't understand why they were not being allowed to eat when the dishes were all right there on the table.
Li Yundong said with a straight face, "It's improper for you to rush up and grab the food in a hurry like a bunch of barbarians. Girls, listen to me carefully. Go and find a chair and sit down properly!"
The little foxes of the Fox Zen School replied with beaming smiles, "Yes!" Then they ran to the other rooms to find something to sit on. Someone shouted, "Leader, there are no chairs left, what should we do?"
Li Yundong also shouted, "Then you'll have to stand!"
Zhou Qin suddenly said with a teasing laugh, "Master, why do I feel like you are the Golden Horn in The Journey to the West? It seems like an old legendary creature is leading a group of lesser legendary creatures?"
As she spoke, Cao Yi and others of Fox Zen School all looked at her and smiled without saying anything. Li Yundong said with a grin, "No, no, no. I am clearly the king of the Country of Women! The one in the The Journey to the West was a female ruler. I am the male king!"
Only then did everyone notice that Li Yundong was the only male and the other dozen or so people in the room were all stunning beauties.
Ruan Hongling scolded gleefully, "You must have stayed a bachelor your whole life! Tut, there are so many beautiful women here and you're the only man in the room. If God found out about this kind of romantic luck, I'm afraid he'd strick you down with lightning!"
Zi Yuan shouted, "Hongling, don't talk nonsense!"
Li Yundong chuckled and said, "It's okay, it's okay." He waved his hand and gestured for the crowd to sit. He was the leader of the sect, so he naturally sat at the head of the table. Cao Yi and other elders of Fox Zen School sat to his left. Zi Yuan, as the future leader of Linggong Sect and a friend of Li Yundong, naturally sat to his right on the basis of their personal relationship and public relations. Ruan Hongling sat next to Zi Yuan.
Li Yundong wanted to allocate other people's seats when suddenly Su Chan walked towards him slowly. He gave a quick laugh and said: "Hmmm, Didn't you say you weren't going to eat anything?"
Su Chan had originally hoped that everyone would forget her earlier vow so that she could take the opportunity to come over and eat. When everyone saw her coming, they all consistently kept silent, but Li Yundong brought it up, hitting her where it hurt!
Su Chan stomped her feet and said angrily, "Just now I asked you for something to eat, but you pretended not to hear it. Why did you hear me clearly earlier?"
Li Yundong deliberately wanted to tease her. He chuckled and said, "I didn't hear anything just now, but I heard you say earlier that you wouldn't eat! How can you go back on your words?"
Su Chan snorted as if she had already prepared for this. She said triumphantly, "Humph, I only said I didn't want to eat, not that I wouldn't eat anything at all!"
As soon as heard what she'd said, everyone laughed. Li Yundong touched Su Chan’s nose and said with a smile: “Slick! Well, sit beside Cao Yi for dinner!” Then he turned to talk with Zhou Qin. “Zhou Qin, you can sit next to Su Chan and the others. Just sit down at your leisure."
There were more than a dozen people sitting around one table, making it fully occupied. Everyone looked eagerly at the dishes and then looked towards Li Yundong, their chopsticks held in mid-air. As soon as Li Yundong gave the order, they would tuck in.
Li Yundong noticed that Zhou Qin, who was usually the most shrewd and had the strongest willpower, was constantly swallowing. It was obvious that she was hungry. He didn't make them wait any longer and said with a laugh, "Well, let's start!"
He had barely finished his sentence when the crowd cheered and pounced on the food like tigers pouncing on their prey!
Li Yundong saw that the delicious dishes and chopsticks were flying in all directions around the table at once. He gasped and thought in his heart: "God, How could this be the beginning of a meal? It's more like a war! Do these girls think they are in a battle?"
Li Yundong saw that Su Chan had picked up a bowl of vegetables and meat and began to devour it. He couldn't help but stand up and tap Su Chan's bowl with his chopsticks. He shouted, "Hey, you're a cultivator after all! Eat slowly!"
Su Chan mumbled something perfunctory but didn't slow down at all. Li Yundong was speechless. He knocked on her bowl again and shouted, "Hey, if you keep eating so fast, I'll take away your bowl!"
Su Chan quickly turned around and covered the bowl with her hands greedily. She mumbled, "Zhou Qin is eating fast as well and she is your disciple. Why don't you remind her?"
Li Yundong turned his head and saw that Zhou Qin's bowl was also filled to the brim, in a manner that was most unladylike. Li Yundong stared at her and said, "Don't you want to maintain appearances?"
Zhou Qin gave a hollow laugh. "Master, I'm just an ordinary person. I can't compare to your cultivators. I can only be strong when I've eaten properly." Following these words, she stuffed another two pieces of duck meat into her mouth.
Li Yundong felt depressed and speechless. He turned his head to look at Zi Yuan, ready to ask for help. He said, "Zi Yuan, say something, you..."
Before he could even finish his sentence, he saw that Zi Yuan had just dragged the two vegetable dishes that were in front of her towards herself after she saw everyone fighting over the dishes explosively. Fortunately, the people from the Fox Zen School were a group of starving demons who had never eaten meat before, so they were all focused on snatching the meat dishes. Zi Yuan dragged two vegetarian dishes away and no one gave her so much as a second glance.
Though they didn't notice what had happened to Zi Yuan, Li Yundong was stunned by her behavior. He stammered, "Zi Yuan, you didn't kick up a fuss, did you?"
Zi Yuan looked at him innocently. "Cultivators also have to eat!" As she spoke, she continued eating. Although her manner of eating was gentle, her eating speed was extremely fast. Li Yundong watched as she and Ruan Hongling quickly hoovered up the two dishes in front of them!
Li Yundong only saw that this group of starving demons were practically throwing themselves on the table. He even couldn't see the dishes through the fray. He stared at them directly and took a deep breath, saying, "My God, you're not eating but fighting! Well, if you're not polite, then I won't be polite either! Watch this!"
With a loud shout, he picked up the chopsticks in his hand and made two crisp sounds.
Everyone heard his shout and raised their heads momentarily. Just as Li Yundong was about to put his chopsticks down, he saw everyone standing up and revealing the dining table. All the dishes had been swept away. There was nothing left!
Li Yundong was astonished. "You... you polished everything off in less than a minute!?"
Everyone looked at each other and laughed awkwardly. Su Chan stuck out his tongue and carried a soup bowl over, saying, "Yundong, there is still some soup left!"
Li Yundong took the bowl from her and saw that there was only broth inside, with not so much as a green onion left! He couldn't help but rant, "F*ck, you really are a group of female bandits! You didn't even leave anything for me. Did everyone forget the words you said about respecting me? This meal was made by me, but you didn't even leave anything for me!"
Cao Yi smiled obsequiously and said, "Leader, I have a braised pork ball in brown sauce here. Do you want it?"
Li Yundong said angrily, "Bring it here! It'll be better than nothing!"
But when he took it to have a look, he thought, "Geez, this pork ball has already been bitten so much. How can I eat it now?"
Li Yundong was so angry that he couldn't help but lose his temper. But suddenly, he heard Ruan Hongling say, "By the way, there's still..."
A spark of hope jolted through Li Yundong. "Is there anything else left?"
Ruan Hongling said slowly, "There are two pots of rice in the kitchen. You can take the braised pork ball in brown sauce and eat it with two pots of rice!"
After that, all the women burst out laughing.
Tears streamed down Li Yundong's face. "My goodness, what kind of a paradise is this? This is more like some kind of hell!"