Chapter 251
My dad called Director Cao under Auntie Ren's gaze of contempt.
“Cao, I got into something troublesome like you, can you help me out?”
Director Cao replied with delight:
“No problem! Get a piece of paper to write it down! The best clinic to cure genital warts is #47 Tong Hu Road…”
“It's not genital warts!” My dad seemed ashamed and unable to show his face in front of Auntie Ren, “It's the anti-p.o.r.n brigade! I got caught by the anti-p.o.r.n brigade!”
There was a momentary pause on the other end of the phone, “Boss Ye, you're too dishonest! Last time you even refused to go with me to a foot bath place, but now you're prowling outside by yourself? Let me tell you, there's a certain methodology for calling prost.i.tutes…”
My dad interrupted before he could spew even more dirty speech: “It's not what you're thinking of, I'm being wrongly accused! Anyways, help me think of a solution. Doesn't the president of the HHH enthusiasts club have a lot of connections? Can you ask him to help me out?”
Director Cao hesitated for a bit, “Actually, I was also caught by the brigade a couple of days ago and our president just bailed me out. Would it be too frequent? The president would think all the members are lechers…”
“Nonsense! How would he not know his members are lechers as the president!” My dad accidentally said in a loud voice and felt regret after seeing Auntie Ren's insincere smile, “I'm in an awkward position right now. Can you tell the president I'll never forget his benevolence if he could save me!”
Director Cao sighed helplessly, “Okay, I'll ask him for a favor. But he wasn't satisfied with your last AV review, so you have to change it.”
“Eh? What was wrong with my review? Did I go overboard with the literature?”
“Not really, the president appreciates your literary talent. But you shouldn't use the joke you made about North Koreans having no food again.”
My dad couldn't understand why making fun of North Koreans makes the president unhappy, but he was in an urgent situation, so he agreed.
A half-hour later, the vice-captain of the brigade knocked and entered the room. He respectfully apologized to Auntie Ren and my dad and pushed on the blame on themselves. They even promised to take responsibility for damages caused to the news station and the whole situation was somehow resolved.
Yet Auntie Ren was not especially grateful.
“Hmph, it was a friend who accompanies you to brothels, right? All men are the same! If I knew I was going to be rescued by such a filthy person, I would have just called my old man and apologized!”
Auntie Ren once again handed my wages to my dad and disappeared into the night.
Actually, since I had control of our store's bank account, I manage amounts far greater than 2000. So my dad sent me a text to congratualge my first appearance on camera and told me to buy stuff for myself to celebrate. Then he transferred the money into the bank account.
In the end, Auntie Ren was determined to hand a minor's wages to their guardian, but she was caught by the anti-p.o.r.n brigade instead.
Soon it was Monday again.
After the flag-raising ceremony, I saw Xiong YaoYue place a whole bunch of toys on her desk like a vendor. She beckoned the girls to go over and pick one up.
Xiong YaoYue crossed her legs and tapped a metal ruler against the side of her desk, “Hey, hey, giving away dolls! Limited quant.i.ty, first come first serve! As long as you call me ‘husband', you can take whichever one you want!”
Currently, the cla.s.s leader was at her regular meeting so no one bothered Xiong YaoYue and she acted like a king.
At first, no one had the nerve to pick one up. It was the fearless Loud Mouth who walked over and picked up a monkey doll.
“I'll take this!” Loud Mouth wanted to leave after taking a doll, but Xiong YaoYue stopped her.
“Hey! Call me husband, husband!” Xiong YaoYue was not willing to let Loud Mouth go.
Loud Mouth clicked her tongue, “You want me even though I'm this fat?”
“Why would I not! I want a harem and I don't care if they're fat or skinny! Call me husband or you won't be able to take that monkey!”
“Who the h.e.l.l wants to call you husband! Even if you don't care I'm fat, I care about how dark-skinned you are!”
“What's wrong with being dark-skinned? Dark skin is a symbol of health! If you don't want to call me husband, you can also call me dear!”
“That's even more disgusting! I'm gonna take it anyway, what are you going to do about it!”
“You… fickle woman! You only got near me for this monkey…”
“Who got near you! Why are you pretending you were abandoned! Let go of my hand! You good-for-nothing!”
“Huh? I guess good-for-nothing is also another name for husband, I'll let you off for today! Next!”
Following Loud Mouth, there were actually a few cheap girls who went to Xiong YaoYue to pick out a doll. Every one of them would whisper something in Xiong YaoYue's ear. I'm a.s.suming they actually called her husband since she looks like she was in ecstasy
A lot of the boys were envious of Xiong YaoYue and said:
“If I buy a large pile of toys, will the girls call me husband? If the study committee member calls me husband and kisses me, I could die with no regrets!”
Little Smart who was sitting behind him, poured cold water on his parade, “Quit dreaming, the girls are only willing to pick up the dolls because Xiao Xiong is a girl! Even then, Gong CaiCai hasn't picked one up yet!”
I noticed Gong CaiCai look back multiple times as if a doll had caught her eye. But with her reserved personality, there was no way she would call Xiong YaoYue husband. So she stayed put until all the dolls were distributed.
After the first cla.s.s ended, Xiong YaoYue jumped in front of Gong CaiCai's desk. She took out a doll from behind her back and handed it to Gong CaiCai with a big smile.
“Hahahaha~~~~ How could I forget my queen? I am not a fickle emperor! Cai Cai, don't you like plants? Take it, no need to thank me!”
Gong CaiCai looked at the peashooter and made an unnatural smile, “Um… I like plants that don't hit people, also I won't… call you husband…”
“No problem!” Xiong YaoYue patted Gong CaiCai's shoulder, “Peashooters shoot zombies, not people! Also, even if we aren't legally husband and wife, we are in fact husband and wife in name. You can accept this small gift without worrying!”
Gong CaiCai said in a quiet voice: “Who… who is husband… and wife…” she said halfway before she couldn't say anymore.
Xiao Qin watched the event unfold, but it seems she had no interest.
“Don't you like dolls?” I was a bit curious.
“I do!” Xiao Qin immediately replied, “All female protagonists of shoujo manga like dolls! How can I not like dolls!”
She changed the topic and said: “But I would only like dolls Ye Lin cla.s.smate gives me! Wouldn't I be considered a fickle woman if I accept dolls from anyone?”
I don't think it's that big a of a problem.
“Also, I've been thinking about something more important lately…” Xiao Qin waved the pencil in her hand and seemed to be a bit frustrated.
” —— I feel like my characteristics are too simple.”
Huh? Do you think you're an anime character? What characteristics do you want?
“Other than being your childhood friend, I don't have any other special traits…”
Who said that? Aren't you the 24th successor of the killing fist?
“Recently, in some of the chat groups I joined for shoujo manga, a lot of people said the tides are changing. Being childhood friends used to be an advantage, but now it's a disadvantge. Nowadays, childhood friends are discarded….”
Regardless of whatever tides, you never left any good memories as my childhood friend! It's already a disadvantage for you!
Xiao Qin clenched her soft pink hands, “That's why I want to get more traits! I don't want to keep being so flimsy!”
You're not flimsy! You have boundless power when you're beating the s.h.i.+t out of someone in your blackened state!
Also, are traits changed that easily? Do you want to grow your hair out longer and be labeled as a long, black, and straight girl like the cla.s.s leader? That might make your character lose even more appeal! It's the failure of a screenwriter when charaters overlap!
“I won't change my appearance, that's too risky! I found a shortcut after reading shoujo manga for this many years!”
” ——Which is a special interest and hobby! It could be drawing or music! As long as you have one, it's basically a free characteristic!”
“So I decided to have other interests besides Ye Lin cla.s.smate!”
Hey, do I also count as an interest? You should give up on me as I'm harmful to girls!
“Hehehehe~~~” Xiao Qin covered her mouth behind a textbook and made a sinister laugh, “Since I've already read shoujo manga for this many years, I should start as a mangaka!”
Stop dreaming! If you draw people at the same level as potatoes, you're light years away from becoming a mangaka!