I Might Be A Fake Cultivator

Today was a very important day.

The first group of new students was about to descend into the mortal world!

An Lin, Xuanyuan Cheng, and Xu Xiaolan were led to the Heavenly Court’s Southern Heavenly Gate by their homeroom teacher, Sword Immortal Ling Xiao.

The United University of Cultivation was built upon a floating continent and it was considered part of the Heavenly Court’s territory. However, it was located on the outskirts of the Heavenly Court’s territory.

The main territory of the Heavenly Court lay upon an even larger floating continent.

Comparing it to The United University of Cultivation would be like comparing a city to a village…

In order to reach the Southern Heavenly Gate—a place which had a space teleportation gate—An Lin and the others had to fly a full five-hundred miles.

The mission they had been assigned when descending into the mortal world was to strengthen the seal on a demonic pagoda which was located in the Kunlun Mountain Ranges. In addition to this, they were also tasked with exterminating a Demon King of the mortal world, whose doings had bobbed up in the news recently.

There were four types of monstrosities in the mortal world: Evil Spirits, Demons, Ghosts, and Monsters.

Evil Spirits and Demons were monsters who had a conscience, whereas Ghosts and Monsters were twisted and chaotic.

They were divided into four categories of strength: Pawns, Generals, Kings, and Emperors.

Monsters of the Pawn category had a strength equivalent to that of the Fifth Stage Dao Body.

Monsters of the General category had a strength equivalent to that of the Tenth Stage Dao Body.

Monsters of the King category had a strength equivalent to that of the Spirit Nurturing Initial Stage. When monsters reached this level, it was generally very difficult for cultivators of the mortal world to deal with them. At that time, the mortal departments concerned would report it to the Heavenly Court through a special channel of communication.

As for monsters of the Emperor category, their strength was at least equivalent to that of the Half-Step Soul Formation Stage ¹ . Whenever they appeared, they would cause a massive commotion amongst the mortal world.

To An Lin’s team, the mission that they were assigned this time wasn’t so difficult.

After all, they had Xuanyuan Cheng’s coattail to ride on. He was an individual who could beat even the Spirit Nurturing Intermediate Stage cultivators of their school. In other words, perhaps even Spirit Nurturing Final Stage cultivators of the Kingdom of the Nine States would be unable to defeat him…

Of course, being the team leader, An Lin’s duty was much greater than that of Xuanyuan Cheng and the others.

That’s right, he still needed to daigou!

…

At the Southern Heavenly Gate, two jade pillars embellished with dragon patterns towered into the skies.

Between the two pillars, there was a multi-colored screen of light which rippled slightly.

Two Divine Generals stood with weapons in hand, manning the Southern Heavenly Gate.

An extremely vast and powerful aura emanated from their bodies. Seeing An Lin and his team arrive, the only response they gave was a slight nod.

Sword Immortal Ling Xiao handed a document to one of the Divine Generals. On this document were the details regarding their mission, as well as the coordinates of the team’s target location.

“You’re all heading to the Kunlun Mountains, huh. The target location is Baiyun Temple of Rong City. No problems!” The Divine General nodded, then he used an immortal spell to form a holographic screen.

Wow! So fancy!

An Lin blinked excitedly as he watched on.

This must be a scene from a sci-fi movie, right? Immortal spells can be used for simulations?

“Enter this door first!” The Divine General waved his hand at An Lin and the others.

Hearing this, An Lin took charge and walked into the large door rippling with multi-colored light.

After crossing the screen of light, he found that his surroundings were grey and murky. There was no sense of direction, and even the ground had disappeared. It was as if he was amidst a vast expanse of chaos.

After the three of them all crossed the door, the Divine General started selecting the target location.

“Thank you for your help.” Sword Immortal Ling Xiao cupped his hands and saluted slightly toward the two Divine Generals, expressing his gratitude.

“No worries, it’s all part of our duty,” the Divine General who was operating the hologram responded.

Immediately afterward, he felt a slight itch on his nose.

Then, he opened his mouth.

“Achoo!” The Divine General sneezed, and he accidentally pressed the ‘teleport’ button on the holographic screen…

“Ah… sh*t!” The Divine General looked apologetically at Sword Immortal Ling Xiao.

Sword Immortal Ling Xiao: “…”

…

On a beautiful blue planet, there existed a lovely mountain full of spiritual energy.

On this lovely mountain, a small yet majestic flower bloomed.

I’m a flower spirit.

What I do every day is peacefully grow my roots, happily photosynthesize, and diligently cultivate.

When the sun shines brightly, I peacefully grow my roots, happily photosynthesize, and diligently cultivate.

When the rain pours endlessly, I peacefully grow my roots, try my best to photosynthesize, and diligently cultivate.

When the spring radiance is boundless, I peacefully grow my roots, joyfully photosynthesize, and diligently cultivate.

When the summer sun casts shadows, I peacefully grow my roots, cheerily photosynthesize, and diligently cultivate.

When the autumn wind dyes forests, I peacefully grow my roots, dejectedly photosynthesize, and diligently cultivate.

When the winter snow flutters about, I peacefully grow my roots, earnestly photosynthesize, and diligently cultivate.

…

Do you all feel very annoyed when you see this place?

That’s the reason why I can cultivate myself to become an Immortal, while all of you are just mere mortals…

Day after day I photosynthesize, and year after year I diligently cultivate…

I also feel very bored. However, I’ve been able to persist this entire time!

Today is the day that I succeed, today is the last day before I attain Immortal Ascension!

I need to persist for one more day. As long as I can make it through today…

Today’s wind is very noisy. However, there is a special kind of warmth amidst this noise.

I raise my proud head slightly. Up in the sky, there is the lovely blazing sun and a… big bum?

I have a bad feeling about this…

The large bum in the sky is getting closer and closer, and the path of its descent… leads to where I am!

It can’t be… My luck can’t be that lousy, right?!

I’ve painstakingly cultivated for tens of years. Yet, the day before I attain Immortal Ascension, I’m going to be flattened to death by a large bum?

“Save me! A flower is about to die!”

The flower spirit yelled loudly, and a sparkling dewdrop emerged on the red flower…

Bam!

The big bum smashed down, crushing the flower into the earth.

“Ow, ow, ow…” A handsome youth grimaced in pain as he rubbed his backside.

The youth who had descended from the skies was none other than the one in charge of the mortal mission, An Lin.

“Ahhhh!”

A supple body descended from the skies and plunged into An Lin’s lap.

Bam!

Another plume of dust was kicked up. This time it was Xu Xiaolan who had descended.

Fortunately, An Lin was there to cushion her fall, so she didn’t sustain many injuries.

Xu Xiaolan blushed slightly. She was flustered as she wriggled free from An Lin’s lap and stood up.

“Thank you.” Xu Xiaolan looked gratefully toward An Lin.

“You’re welcome. To be honest, I didn’t actually want to act as a cushion…” The feeling of embracing a girl really wasn’t all that great. An Lin felt as if he had almost been crushed unconscious by Xu Xiaolan.

Xu Xiaolan: “…”

Whoosh!

A male cut through the air on his sword and there was an apologetic expression on his extremely handsome face.

“I’m so sorry Student Xu Xiaolan and Student An Lin.

“I was teleported here a little after you two. Otherwise, you two wouldn’t be like this right now…”

The male was none other than Xuanyuan Cheng. He jumped off his flying sword and apologized humbly.

An Lin shook his head. “It’s not your fault. If we want to blame something, then we should blame the bloody teleportation. It teleported us into such a high altitude. Do they really think that cultivators of the Dao Body Stage can fly?!”

He felt immense resentment toward the two guards at the Southern Heavenly Gate. If his cultivation base was a little lower and his bones were a little weaker, then he really would become the first student to die of teleportation when descending into the mortal world on a mission.

Right at this moment, a tender and soft voice sounded from under him.

“Ah! Move your bum away you big b*stard! You’re crushing this flower!”

This sound gave An Lin a small fright. He hurriedly jumped up and looked toward the ground.

There, he could see a delicate and beautiful flower stuck firmly to the ground.

Its lush green stem had already been snapped and from it, a bright red liquid was flowing out…