I Might Be A Fake Cultivator

“Come here An Kirin, let daddy hold you.” Xu Xiaolan passed the miniature baby in her hands to An Kirin.

An Lin carefully held the golden baby with trembling hands and was at loss for words.

The baby’s skin was very smooth, and it had a numbing sensation to the touch, presumably because of the lightning crackling around its body.

The golden baby seemed to have exhausted itself from crying and fell silent. It then looked up at An Lin with curiosity etched on its cute, innocent face.

“Who are you? And why did you come out of my stomach?” An Lin gently touched the golden baby’s cheek.

The baby didn’t seem to understand what An Lin was saying and giggled with delight. “Papa!”

“I’m not your dad!” An Lin instantly replied with a solemn expression.

The baby blinked in confusion before turning its head to look at Xu Xiaolan. “Mama!”

A blush appeared on Xu Xiaolan’s face after hearing this. She glared at An Lin and humphed coldly. “Hmph, the saying ‘like father like son’ certainly rings true here. An Kirin has just been born and he’s already a pervert!”

An Lin almost blacked out from her words. What the f*ck was this about like father like son, he didn’t want to be a father!

An unexpected chorus of chatter suddenly erupted from the bystanders around him.

Su Qianyun pressed her hand to her cherry lips in shock. “Classmate An Lin and the Golden Void Lightning Kirin clearly didn’t kiss each other, how did he fall pregnant? And weren’t women supposed to give birth? Can men do the same too? Huh, wait, is the Golden Void Lightning Kirin male or female?”

Everyone completely ignored Su Qianyun’s string of questions. Only the gods knew how her world view had been twisted to such an extent, and none of them dared to correct her in fear of incurring the wrath of Chang’e…

Hu Guan, Yao Mingxi, and the other retarded superfans instantly offered up words of praise in excitement. “As expected of Big Brother An, you truly are the legend of the school! Who else in this world could sleep with divine lightning and give birth to a child of lightning!”

“The gods are no longer able to stop Big Brother An’s advancing footsteps! Woof!” Da Bai chimed in.

“I heard there has recently been a powerful cultivator by the name of Long Aotian who appeared in the Kingdom of the Nine States and declared that he was going to defy the gods. He can’t even compare to Classmate An Lin though! After all, An Lin has already subdued the heavens and gave birth to An Kirin!” Tang Ximen exclaimed in amazement.

The remaining few logical people like Liu Dabao and Zhao Huaiyin were completely speechless. They could only look around them with blank expressions, wondering if the world had been tipped on its head.

Earth Immortal Ming Yuan hurriedly made his way to the summit from the foot of the mountain. He had a hand laid over his heart in shock, but his eyes were glowing with a brilliant light.

“Hahaha… Student An Lin, thank you for helping me attain enlightenment. I’m going to go into seclusion right now, and I’ll be sure to visit you with a present if I break through to Return to Void Stage!”

Earth Immortal Ming Yuan chortled like a madman before turning to Vice-Principal Yu Hua. “Principal, I want to apply for leave! The gate before me has already been opened!”

Vice-Principal Yu Hua took a deep breath as he tried to calm his surging emotions before waving a hand at Ming Yuan. “Your request has been granted, it would be a great fortune for the school and the Heavenly Court alike if you can break through to Return to Void Stage!”

Earth Immortal Ming Yuan bowed deeply to An Lin before hurriedly flying away, leaving a bunch of shocked onlookers in his wake.

“What was that about? An Lin’s tribulation transcendence can help teachers reach Return to Void Stage?”

“I can feel my heart trembling. I can accept the fact that Classmate An Lin’s tribulation lightning was Golden Void Lightning, I can reluctantly accept that the Golden Void Lightning was able to take on the shape of a Kirin, I can even accept the fact that he was able to manipulate the Golden Void Lightning… But what the f*ck is this baby that he’s given birth to right after transcending his tribulation?! Not only that, but he can also help Teacher Ming Yuan break through to Return to Void Stage? What the actual f*ck is going on!!”

Vice-Principal Yu Hua knew he couldn’t let things continue like this, otherwise, the situation was going to spiral out of his control.

He immediately made a decision to send most of the students and teachers away before taking An Lin and his friends to a place where there were no bystanders.

At a small pavilion beside a lake, An Lin, Xu Xiaolan, and Xuanyuan Cheng were gathered together along with Vice-Principal Yu Hua. They had been teleported here by Vice-Principal Yu Hua’s spatial spell technique.

Vice-Principal Yu Hua stared at the golden baby in An Lin’s hands and experimentally poked a finger at his stomach.

The golden baby bared his teeth and glared at Yu Hua.

After seeing that Yu Hua’s finger was beginning to glow with light, the golden baby began to squirm in An Lin’s hands, and a string of unintelligible noises came out of his mouth before he bit down on Yu Hua’s finger.

Crack!

Yu Hua felt an extremely pure bolt of lightning strike his finger and an expression of shock appeared on his face.

“Principal, do you know what this baby is?”

An Lin could only hope that Vice-Principal Yu Hua knew a thing or two about the origins of this baby.

Yu Hua slowly retracted his hand and furrowed his bushy brows. “An Kirin doesn’t appear to be a complete, intelligent life form, but he possesses a spirit of his own, almost like an immortal tool. Since you gave birth to him, I think you should try to form a spiritual connection with him.”

An Lin heaved a light sigh of relief after hearing Yu Hua’s analysis. Thank goodness the golden baby wasn’t an actual child, otherwise, his reputation would be screwed! He would be known throughout the world as the first ever child-bearing man!

He calmed his emotions and tried to use his consciousness to connect with the golden baby, to no avail.

Yu Hua didn’t appear deterred by An Lin’s failed attempt. Instead, he suggested another method. “An Kirin has an extremely pure lightning power in his body along with a unique set of energy-circulation meridians. If you want to forge a connection with him, I suggest you use a drop of your blood.”

“That’s a great idea!” An Lin’s eyes instantly lit up.

He had been stunned by the string of recent events and had lost the capacity to think about his situation.

Although he still didn’t know what this golden baby was, he did come out of his stomach so he had to have a strong connection to An Lin. If he wasn’t some type of life form, then he must be a spiritual object. If An Lin wanted to find out more about him, he could try to forge a connection with his blood.

An Lin released a droplet of his own blood essence which then hovered in front of the golden baby’s face.

Everyone held their breaths and stared at the baby as if they were witnessing something groundbreaking.

An Kirin looked at the drop of blood essence with a curious experience. He then took a whiff before his eyes lit up, and he instantly swallowed the drop of blood essence.

“Do you feel something now?” Vice-Principal Yu Hua asked curiously.

An Lin shook his head with an expression full of confusion.

He turned his gaze to look at the baby, who was smacking his lips with a satisfied expression.

However, his condition suddenly began to take a drastic turn for the worse.

Everyone was startled by the pained expression that suddenly appeared on the baby’s face and even Vice-Principal Yu Hua had his eyes wide open with shock.

“Waah… Waah… Waah…”

An Kirin began to cry and roll around in anguish in An Lin’s lap.

“What’s going on? Could it be that An Kirin’s body is rejecting Classmate An Lin’s blood?” Xuanyuan Cheng mused with a perplexed expression.

“Why do I feel like An Kirin has been poisoned…” Xiao Hong wobbled her read head and spoke in a sweet voice.

“Gasp…” A thought suddenly occurred to An Lin after hearing this.

His blood was lethal poison to some life forms!

Then… Could it be that the baby had been poisoned by his blood!?

As if to verify An Lin’s speculation, An Kirin suddenly began to froth at the mouth as his eyes rolled back into his head and his stomach expanded like a balloon…

Bam!

A loud pop suddenly erupted.

An Kirin had blown up in front of everyone’s eyes…