Chapter 57 - Hilda's Journal (Mother's Faith)
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4E-178, 2nd of Hearthfire;
It has been long since I have arrived to this alien desert, the unusual land and heat took a toll on me when I came here first...
The fight against the Thalmor and their Dominion proved hard and we lost many goods friends...
My brothers were long since called back to Skyrim, I am staying here though, Jonrad is a mess without my help, he can forget meals when he start researching his magic....
I had to start learning Magic too, I really don't like complicated stuff, just give me an axe and tell me who to chop. I know my mother and the female elders are all magic users but how can they expect everyone to be this smart....
My notes proved less important these days, I only get summoned by the forebears when there is a skirmish or a raid, even Jonrad started complaining about how stupid this fight is becoming......
His main goal was to master the Fire magic, we started getting bored of fighting so I decided to ask him to go back to Skyrim and continue his studies at Winterhold at least, but there was no helping it....
***
4E-178, 30th of Sun's Dusk;
Jonrad made a huge leap in his research, he reached a great result in his search for the lost art.......
An unexpected visitors came to my door, father and my brothers popped up out of no where. They asked me and Jonrad to return but Jonrad can't miss the breakthroughs he achieved......
Father told me and Jonrad to get married if we were to stay, father always had a high opinion of Jonrad so he didn't want Jonrad to stray from the family and have a chance to return one day........
I myself wouldn't mind...
***
4E-179, 8th of Morning Star;
We got married in Elinhir east of Hammerfell, few number of friends and family were there, after it father took his people and left, he finished what he always wanted and tied Jonrad back to the family........
The place we were planning to settle in was Dragonstar in the North between High Rock, Skyrim and Hammerfell....
Jonrad was following his obsession and I was tagging along in his adventures, I can't complain as I am the one who chose all this way of life...
The only one who I am sad about is old man Fultheim, ever since the disbanding of the Blades he followed Jonrad as his attendant and helped in everything one can help for, he doesn't speak much about his time in the war though.....
***
4E-179, 2nd of First Seed;
Dragonstar looked pretty much as a combination between Skyrim architecture, Hammerfell weather and High Rocks people.....
I ran into an old friend being dragged to prison this morning, someone can actually catch Delvin Malory himself, this is a scandal....
I talked with Jonrad to free the old fool, he proved useful many times to the clan and we Fire-Manes value our friends.....
***
4E-180, 15th of Midyear;
I don't know if this is good news or bad news, the Redguards signed a treaty with the Thalmor and now we are in trouble, people like Jonrad and me are on the Thalmor's most wanted list. We killed a lot of their people and they will use this treaty to finish off all the leaders of the resistance....
The Forebears assured us that nothing would happen and they would protect us as long as we don't venture south into Hammerfell.....
Funny! They thought the Thalmor will have any respect to a treaty on a piece of paper...
For a Blade like Jonrad, the have already Thalmor saw him as a threat and must be taken down....
Jonrad was concerned and we planned to leave Hammerfell to High Rock, it will be much safer than going South or through the usual ways through the empire, we can take a ship from there back to Skyrim......
***
4E-180, 3rd of Sun's Height;
We were preparing to leave north but something happened. While I was at the market, a strange man saw me and jumped in fear, he mumbled so many words that I couldn't comprehend, some of them were regarding Three Elder Scrolls, a child and me....
I arrested the man with force and took him to Jonrad, the man said many things but from what we could tell, I was carrying a child.....
I immediately ran to the monk in town and asked for a check. Indeed, I was pregnant.
***
4E-180, 5rd of Sun's Height;
The strange man was called Kellen and he was a Moth Priest, these were the people who could read the Elder Scrolls....
He said that he divinated that the child I am carrying is fated with acquiring three of the Elder Scrolls...
I remember back at the Great War whem the White-Gold treaty was signed, all of the Elder Scrolls in the Imperial Library mysteriously disappeared on their own, then the priesthood of the Ancestor Moth went to look for them everywhere...
This was not good, from the mess this man made in the market, the Thalmor will hear of it and will come with a heavy force after me, a child fated with three Elder Scrolls is something anyone would fear, or rather would want to acquire......
We knocked the man unconscious and fleed the city under the cover of darkness, we certainly detected many moves but nothing we couldn't handle.....
***
4E-180, 20th of Sun's Height;
We found a refugee in an old resistance hideout, a friend of Jonrad took us in and we were welcomed, we need a place to stay for a long time, so we sent Fultheim after that purpose...
***
4E-180, 6th of Last Seed;
I couldn't write anything for a while, we changed locations after a certain accident. This so-called friend tried to poison Jonrad but failed, we killed our way out, the man begged for mercy saying that the Thalmor had his family. Why would I care? If something threatened my family, I'll murder a thousand family in exchange. After that night we kept traveling for days........
***
4E-180, 21st of Last Seed;
Fultheim found a nice little village near Illiac Bay, a nice place to lay low, I also can't move much these days, and I also have to hide myself.
***
4E-180, 17th of Evening Star;
For the last four months, Jonrad and Fultheim disguised themselves as farmers. I hid in the house the whole day, many spies and informants passed the village but no one could see through the father-son act of Fultheim the Fearless and Jonrad Fire-Mane....
I also think I will give birth in a month or so....
***
4E-181, 29th of Morning Star;
A week ago, I gave birth to a baby boy. A beautiful baby boy.
We called him Jonhild, after Jonrad and Hilda. May Kyne watch over him!
***
4E-181, 15th of Sun's Dawn;
Jonhild is healthy but he sleeps all the time, only an old woman from the village could interact with me so I understood from her some of this and that....
Jonrad is planning something big, he and Fultheim will attract the biggest amount of pursuers possible north, and open a path for me to the south, I'll will ride nonstop until I reach Cyrodiil...
***
4E-181, 20th of Sun's Dawn;
I rode for a long time, only thing I know that Jonrad and Fultheim attacked some Dominion ships in Illiac Bay and it got ugly for the Dominion.....
I stopped in a village between Hammerfell and Skyrim, the borders were easy to cross. Now, I only have to wait for two days, if no one came, then I will ride alone to Cyrodiil. Hopefully I get to meet some old friends, or maybe Cassia...
***
4E-181, 22th of Sun's Dawn;
Only Fultheim came back, Jonrad fought his way to the other side of bay and escaped on a ship. Fultheim told me he was being cornered but he doesn't know Fire-Manes when they ride the sea. No fish can corner a whale.
Fultheim himself was a hero that day, when he was retreating it was rumored between travelers that a swordsman killed a hundred Thalmor agent. He gained the title 'Slayer' that day.......
***
4E-181, 1st of First Seed;
I tried to wait for a bit but the Thalmor got wind of us, it was a hairy escape, their greed over the Elder Scrolls made them send their operatives like crazed chase hounds.....
After a few days we reached Bruma, the only stop before Skyrim, there were no hiding now, all parties knew we had to meet in Bruma...
As we managed to hide Jonhild, we engaged in a bloody street fight, these Elves were no match at all, they were nothing to hold us. The good elven fighters mostly died out long ago in the Great War.....
I killed an Elf boy today just because he was at my way and was in the Dominion armor, after I took him with a blow he fell and kept wailing for his mother. Why did any of this had to happen? When will this ever end?......
***
4E-181, 2nd of First Seed;
We ended the Thalmor operatives yesterday so we gained ourselves a day of rest...
Our plan is simple, once the Thalmor catch up, their mounts would be exhausted. We only need to burn the stable on the way and we will lose them for a fair amount of time........
***
This is the last entry I think I will write in this note.
Maybe in this life.
We passed into Skyrim but the Thalmor had a strong presence here. They were too damn organized. They even made deals with some of the Clans.
The way to Helgen was full of traps, and the way between the mountains is the safest route I could think off.
Thankfully, Ivarsted was a remote place off the main road to Riften.
I think I can count on Delvin for some help, he harbors good intentions for me and Jonrad since that day in Dragonstar.
I knew of a way to contact him immediately so I'll be on my way by tomorrow.
Thankful I am to old Fultheim, how could a man be so loyal! He always plays with Jon and thinks highly of him. The old man should put his sword and rest but his old ghosts still chase him from the war till now.
I have my ghosts too. Every night is a nightmare, every day is a worry.
If I can contact my clan then all this would be solved, yet these damn Elves just don't want to give up.
We killed many Warriors and Scouts and some of their so-called Justiciars. They still have no intention to back down.
My choices grow less now.
The only place that can provide us for the long journey is Riften.
The Thalmor know that my aim is the family home in Eastmarsh, they have already blocked every road between me and home.
Riften is my only choice left.
It's a good detour and I can resupply from there, Ivarsted has few to offer, I'll be able to feed Jonhild for only the coming three days.
Jonhild, my child, my sweet child.
What can I do to stop the world from coming after you?
What can I do to protect you?
You and your father share the same hair, eyes and fate.
He is somewhere, out there, fighting hordes of enemies.
The Thalmor doesn't even know which one of us is carrying you.
They suspect me the most as I am the mother, but they also made a counter for the reverse psychology and went after your father.
That's right! Let's add one more twist to this. Your father became a decoy and now it's my turn.
Mother always said I lack faith, but this time, I'll have faith.
You and your father have strong fates, and I'll have faith in that.
Even if I didn't live long enough to witness it, I can already see it.
I can see you high among the clouds. You will reach that height as if nothing! It's already written in your eyes. I have faith in you my son.
You and your father share these lousy stars after all!
Delvin is the right man for taking care of you if I no longer can keep you. See how fate played it out?
Fear not son. You are Jonhild son of Jonrad. A fireborn mother and father. You have the heart of a Fire-Mane and beasts soothe in your presence. How can a mother be so blind!
I feel no fear now.
Still, you had the right to live in peace and someone is denying you that.
They don't know who they are facing now. I will wait to see you grow up into that great person you meant to be. I'll be the one to put a sword in your hands and teach you how to use it.
This is my faith! This is my promise!
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