The Daily Life of the Immortal King

“Officer Gao, are you thinking about something very obscene?” Little Silver cupped his chin as he felt that something wasn’t right with Officer Gao’s expression.

His face had clearly been very solemn just now, but why was it suddenly flushed? He was definitely thinking about something dirty.

There were only a few reasons why a person would blush. Although Little Silver had never watched anything obscene before (mainly because Grenade-Throwing wouldn’t let him…), he still knew some things.

Shamed by the question, Officer Gao was at a loss for words. He indeed had thought of something indecent… but after all, buying a collar for yourself didn’t have to mean that you were looking for “thrills.”

Doing his best to compose himself, Officer Gao asked, “Were you buying yourself a collar because you hurt your neck?”

He recalled the collars for recovery purposes that had appeared on the market previously which were used to protect the spine, so not all “collars” were indecent.

Just like stir-fried noodles with sea cucumbers; some were of decent quality, and some not.

Or take authors as another example. They could also be separated into decent ones and those who slacked off…

Yes, that had to be it! It was his thinking that was twisted!

As an upright police officer who served the people with all his heart and soul, how could his thoughts wander like that?! Gao Tian ah! You gotta pull yourself together, Gao Tian!

However, Little Silver swiftly shook his head. “No, I want to buy a collar so that my owner, my Master can walk me on a leash on the streets!”

Master…

Owner…

On a leash…

And on the streets…

Officer Gao: “Erm… Mr Little Silver, when you say owner…”

It went without saying that if you didn’t know about Little Silver’s real identity at all and looked at the situation purely from a human being’s point of view, there were indeed plenty of connotations that came to mind.

Officer Gao thought that things weren’t looking good for him; this “Silver” in front of him was a little troublesome…

“Owner? Owner is my Master, he’s very strong! It’s like the lyrics say…” Little Silver suddenly thought of the lyrics of a song that was popular recently.

Officer Gao: “What lyrics?”

Little Silver directly sang, “This older brother has been working on his chest, if you still want to lean on it ¹ …”

Officer Gao: “…”

Little Silver: “My owner’s chest is for me to lean on!”

Officer Gao: “…”

…

This incident was slightly more troublesome than the previous two, because the Driver Liu that had been caught wasn’t some bystander, but the “Bi Mad Devil” who had been stirring up trouble recently. Now, “Bi Mad Devil” had been arrested just like that, and moreover had lost his right forearm; there was no way Little Silver could get away from not becoming involved.

In theory, Little Silver had acted heroically for a just cause, but he had been a little heavy-handed. Actually, it was difficult to determine to what extent exactly he was liable for the injury.

However, when Liu Zhenhua had been detained at the time and had entered the police station with his head covered, the media and bystanders that had been circling around nearby, as well as the police staff maintaining order at the scene, had vented their anger and felt that the hero who had “cut off” Liu Zhenhua’s arm had done a truly beautiful job!

By the time Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal found out Little Silver was at the police station, it was after six in the evening…

Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal had had a bad premonition before, and as expected, it came true!

“Hello, is that Mr Grenade-Throwing? Brother Little Silver is at our police station again…” Officer Gao called Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal in a practiced move. In fact, when Little Silver had come the second time, Officer Gao had very resourcefully saved Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal’s phone number into his phone address book.

After being a police officer for a long time, you would develop a very strange type of intuition. Take Officer Gao, for example. He could identify those who would wind up in the police station from time to time, and reality had proven him absolutely right.

Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal: “What did he do this time? Spit again?”

No one else knew Little Silver as well as he did.

“Well…”

Officer Gao sighed deeply. “The suspect we arrested this time said that Mr Little Silver dissolved his arm with a mouthful of phlegm. This is probably some kind of spell, right?”

Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal nodded. “That’s right, Officer Gao, you can think of it that way.” In fact, it wasn’t a spell, but was Little Silver’s own ability as a holy beast… However, Little Silver’s identity had to be kept strictly under wraps for the time being, so this type of misunderstanding actually wasn’t bad.

“As I thought, it’s a spell. But Mr Little Silver insisted that it’s his own ability…” On the phone, Officer Gao was gloomy.

Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal: “…”

Officer Gao: “If Mr Little Silver’s phlegm really has this kind of ability, and he gets chronic pharyngitis later on, who would dare kiss him? One kiss and your tongue would disappear!”

Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal: “…”

Officer Gao continued, “Mr Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal, the current situation is like this: the suspect Liu Zhenhua now believes that he has been disabled by Little Silver’s phlegm and wants Mr Little Silver to be held legally accountable for it.”

“He dares?”

Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal was stunned. This perverted driver had done so many shocking things, but still dared to bite back – how shameless could he be?!

Officer Gao: “Mr Little Silver’s way of handling it indeed helped to vent a lot of anger, but if the matter truly is pursued, the other party may indeed attempt to hold him responsible for an excessive use of force in self-defense.”

Suddenly, Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal’s expression turned severe. “Do you know Secretary Yan? Little Silver is his man!”

“Secretary Yan…”

For some reason, after hearing the words “Secretary Yan ² ,” Officer Gao suddenly felt his head tremble.

Mr Little Silver was some leader’s man?

Officer Gao pondered in his heart.

Combined with Little Silver’s previous statement… Master… collar… on the streets…

Officer Gao instantly felt a chill as his entire body shuddered.

F**k! Had he just learned something outrageous…?

The long silence made Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal frown. “Officer Gao, are you alright? Why aren’t you speaking?”

Officer Gao sweated. “Mr Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal, can I ask you a question…?”

Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal: “Speak your mind, Officer Gao.”

Officer Gao: “Is Secretary Yan’s chest hard or not?”

Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal: “…”

…

By the time Little Silver gave his statement and Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal brought him out of the police station, it was already seven in the evening.

Given how vile the “Bi Mad Devil incident” was plus the mysterious-sounding “Secretary Yan,” Anning District Cultivation Police Station concluded that Little Silver’s mouthful of phlegm was “reasonable self-defense,” and the condition was that Little Silver had to cooperate with the police later and then testify in court.

Of course, there was also the standard “A Heroic and Great Citizen” silk banner and media interview combo, which Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal declined on Little Silver’s behalf; he thought it was still better for them to keep a low profile.

On the road, when Little Silver heard Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal talk about what he had gone through earlier, he was puzzled. “Secretary Yan? Who is this Secretary Yan?”

Grenade-Throwing Senior Immortal: “I randomly made him up.”

Little Silver: “…”